My heart is hurting.

I do not want tomorrow to come.

Tomorrow, my very bestest best friend moves away. She's moving to New Mexico, and I know, I know... it's not the end of the earth. It's not even a different country, and it's not halfway around the world.

But it's too far for me. It's too far for me to call her and say, "Hey, I'm gonna drop off those pictures/boxes/gifts/papers/random objects you wanted, and I'll see you in a minute, okay?" And it's too far for me to run over and snap pictures of Catherine's first days of preschool/kindergarten because I'm just as excited and happy and thrilled for her as she is. And it's too far for me to take my kids trick-or-treating like we've done every year because her neighborhood is more awesome than mine. And it's too far for me to be there for John's first birthday in time. And it's too far for me to make Thanksgiving dinner and give her some of our ham because she never makes it herself, yet she craves it sometimes.

And it's too far for us to throw silly birthday parties together for our joint-birthday. And it's too far for me to do all the tours and house-shopping with her. It's too far for me to help her unpack her kitchen and put everything in just-so places, and for us to see a rainbow together while doing so. And it's too far for me to see Catherine stomping around in her froggy shoes, and for me to teach John all the wonders of Coca-Cola. It's too far for me to get to hug their little arms and kiss their little cheeks. And it's too far for me to baby-sit her precious kiddos while she runs an errand, and to feed them too many mandarin oranges. It's also too far for me to kitty-sit for "Hidey" Milo and "Escapee" Tasha.

And it's too far for us to go on vacation, and then bring back Chick-Fil-A for each other, dropping it by each other's house on our way back home. And it's too far for her to make it to all the boys' school concerts. And to all their book fairs. And their carnivals. And their birthdays. And now I'm just being selfish again...

It's too far for me to fall into her arms when I need her hugs - her special, 'we-don't-do-it-all-the-time-but-she-tou

ches-my-soul-when-we-do' kind of hugs.

This past Friday, the 25th of September, marked seven years to the day that I first walked across the street and introduced myself to Heather. These seven years have been the very best and worst times of my life, and she's been there for every second of it. I can't imagine any of it differently, and I can't imagine it without her. She's in every part of my scrapbook, every part of my life, and she holds a very, very special place in my heart.

Two weeks ago, Catherine and I chatted on the phone. I'd been talking to her mama, and she wanted to say something special. When she was ready to get off, she said, "I love you." And I know I will get to hear her say that on the phone now, but I'm sad for all the goodbye hugs and sweet, goodbye kisses on my cheek that I'll miss.

And I know that New Mexico isn't the end of the earth. I know that I'll trip to see her, and she'll trip to see me. And I know that we'll have to pick certain events/holidays to travel and share with one another, and that we'll always have internet and phonecalls.

But it's too far not to still hurt, and to hurt so deeply.

Lastly, it's too far for me to ever have a chance at being even half the friend and family to her that she has been to me. She is my sister, and she's not too far away to love.

From DL, with love.

I got a postcard from Disneyland from 1grl_revolution today! How fun!

200!

I doubt anyone checks back to this older entry, but this is worth announcing:

JACK HAS READ 200 BOOKS THIS YEAR!

He's had lulls here and there, and he's had months where he just goes crazy with reading. His skill level is amazing, and we couldn't be prouder of his progress over the summer months! He received a progress report home on Thursday, and the news was insane: to be classified at the 'Advanced' level for second grade, he was expected to read 78 words-per-minute. His score:

192 wpm

*cartwheels* We are just blown away! Looking ahead, he should be reading 117+ wpm by the end of the school year to still be classified at 'Advanced.' I've got an idea that's gonna be NO problem. ;-)

School pictures.

I have paid for the boys' school pictures online. Their picture day is Monday, so I'm now prepared. This wasn't on my (short) to-do list today, so now I've gone and overdone it - heh.

Being sick sucks.

Well, I have gotten dressed today. I'm still hacking up a storm, but that is more progress than I've made since Tuesday. I'm going to push through laundry today (though I won't be putting it away), and I'm going to pay bills. Lofty goals, I tell you.

We'll see how this goes...

I just coughed until I puked. I've been on the verge of doing it for days, but tonight it's finally happened. I've got a strong feeling it's not the last time this evening, either...

My coughing has intensified SO MUCH today. I've not eaten a thing all day, in fact, because it seems that I can't stop coughing long enough to even *think* about making something. There's no soup in the house, and Philip is already at work (nightshift).

I've been making cups of tea in the microwave, and I've had two of them today, plus a swallow of water this morning for some headache meds (headaches which are caused, I'm sure, by violent hacking, as they pound more profusely during that time than any other). I know it's not enough, but I keep coughing out the few drops I've tried to suck on, so I'm sure food wouldn't have a good chance either.

:-(

I'm ready to fast-forward to next week. I'm sure I'll be fine by then, and I just wanna get there.

Flu.

There's been a heckuva a lot of snivelling, snotting, hacking, coughing, fevering, sweating, and aching around here the past 48 hours.

And it's all been me.

Hello, flu. How nice to see you again. What's it been... 19 months? My, how you haven't changed.

I pulled my shoulder out this morning in a coughing spasm. One of those sudden, 'I'm-sleeping-*choke*-oh-look!-now-I'm-f

ighting-for-my-life' coughing jags that happen from time-to-time.

I am bone-weary. Though I'd already logged 22 hours for the week by Tuesday, I was off work today. And tomorrow, a meeting has been cancelled due to my absence, and Philip will work my 3-hour lunch shift. I'll find a high schooler to replace me for Friday (they're out of school that day for inservice), and I'm off on Saturday anyway. So I have until Sunday night for my body to recover.

*collapses*

Philip is out right now, helping a friend move some furniture. On his way home, he's picking up The Lost Symbol for me, the brand-new novel from Dan Brown. I hope I have enough energy between near-constant naps to really get into it...

Quenched.

We can't find Vanilla Coke™ anywhere lately, and after several weeks of looking, I was frustrated!

So Philip is on security patrols tonight in our neighborhood, and he was stopping by the base shoppette for a snack. I had an idea, so I asked him to grab two things and bring them by on his route. He did.

And now I'm happily sipping a homemade Vanilla Coke... made with Coca-Cola® and A&W® Cream Soda™. Perfect!

Camping crafts.

The boys are all camping outside in the new tent Heather gave A.J. and Jack for their birthdays. The tent sleeps seven, so they've got TONS of room in there. They have a fan, my iPod and speakers, flashlights, and tons of books - they're camping so "thoroughly modern." I gave them water bottles, and they've been out there since 9:15pm. At 10:30, Philip texted that the boys were *still* reading - no interest in ghost stories yet. Heh, our little bookworms. :-)

Meanwhile, I'm feeling crafty. It might only last for tonight, but the feeling is definitely there. Now... what to do?